JUSTICE!!

Perfectly marvelous news today. Guess what's been slapped with a big fat FAIL. Spiderman: THE MUSICAL. Rumor has it that the producers are throwing in the towel early on this 35 million dollar monstrosity. Cutting their losses. Jumping ship. Making a damn smart move. Whose brilliant idea was it to run the budget up this high? Did anyone involved actually expect to live to see the day this one recouped? Would ANY of us have actually lived that long? I think not, folks, and that's why it's better not to light the match on this powder keg. We're going on rumors here, but this is the happiest news I've heard in a while. Of course, it means that Alan Cumming will not be walking the boards again soon, and I'm none too thrilled about that. But still. Never will I have to cringe at the sight of a big obnoxious Spiderman marquee glowing and sparking at the Hilton. I think pulling the plug here would preserve some of the last shreds of dignity Broadway has left. Julie Taymor, didn't your mother teach you not to kick people when they're down? Well, my mother didn't teach me that either, which means I am going to be very mean and point and laugh while this show spirals downward into a fiery inferno. I'm sorry, darling, but attempt to do a show about a superhero and you bring it on yourself.

And now for some more good news: Brian d'Arcy James has been cast in a new play and will therefore soon be free of Shrek. For those of you not familiar with this technique, it's known as "getting the hell out while you still can." Now, please, will some kind soul please cast company members Foster, Sieber, Tartaglia, and Burton in something that is new and exciting and doesn't suck?

Well, that's just jim dandy, I suppose. On to my new obsession: yoga. Courtesy of my sister's new Wii Fit, I am a newly inducted yoga enthusiast. It's so relaxing and earthy. I am neither relaxed nor earthy, but I dream of the day when I am. I guess Wii Fit as a whole is pretty damn fun, but I love yoga the best. I love Half Moons and Trees and Palm Trees and all those other poses that have nature-related names. But my favorite, my very favorite, is the Sun Salutation. It reminds me of Hair, because really, what else would you have me think about when I've just come home from seeing the show and I'm bending over backwards in a cotton print dress and peace sign earrings and the infuriatingly calm virtual trainer girl is reminding me to keep breathing? It may seem a little stupid that I have to be reminded to breathe, but trust me - snapping your spine in half and attempting to visualize the recommended oceans and lakes has a way of making you forget.