Today I was told, "Of course you don't have to worry about auditions. You're just a professional audience member." Oh. Wow. Is it me or was that dangerously close to being a resounding "fuck you!"? If it was, then right back atcha. This professional audience member is writing your review.
Inkpop Idiots also blabbing about me on the forums. Let them. I LOVE that, really and truly. They think I'm a bitch. Means I'm doing this right. My law teacher told me what it's like to get someone on the witness stand. "You be their buddy. Sweet talk 'em. Lead 'em down that road and then BAM! You cut their throat." That's marvelous, but that's not how I inkpoperate. (I know, right?) I'm not St. Jimmy. This isn't shut your mouth before I shoot you down. I'll let you talk, but I'll silently think to myself that you're an idiot. Moderately kidding. I'm not cutting any throats here. I just can't help it if your stupidity gets in the way of your day to day functioning.
Can you tell I'm in one of my bitchy moods? Sorry. Claude came to lay on my feet and help me with the story I was working. Little did I know that he had just wolfed down my dinner. He threw up on my feet. I hate everything. I'm also pissed that I have to miss Broadway on Broadway. I love that freaking thing. And the tickets for Cabaret are sold out the weekend I'm in Boston. And I'm gaining weight like a bitch. And and and and and and and.
Oh, how loverly. Pretty sure my neighbor's garage just exploded. Well, that certainly invalidates everything in this post, doesn't it. Gonna go check it out.