Thursday, February 5, 2009

My New Addition

When I was five, I had my first and only pet. Her name was Bernice, and she was a goldfish. She was my best friend until my brother overfed her and the poor dear went belly-up. I miss her to this day. Now, eleven years later, I am considering getting a new scaly gold friend. The only problem is I know I'll be emotionally shattered once this new buddy meets her end, but we'll cross that bridge when we come to it. For now, I'm facing a tiny dilemma: should I welcome a new goldfishie into my humble home, whatever shall I name her? It will be something Broadway-related, I think. I need your suggestions!

So far I've been considering:

Louise - Gypsy

Thea - Spring Awakening

Sally - Cabaret

Daisy/Violet - SIDE SHOW

Little Edie - Grey Gardens

Lucille - Parade

Nina - In the Heights

Barbara - August: Osage County

Evelyn Nesbit - Ragtime

Blanche/Stella - A Streetcar Named Desire

Yes, I am seriously considering all these names. Lenora suggested Sarah Palin, but I think I'm just about run the gamut with the Palin jokes by now. Perhaps I'll go with something really original and name my fish something like Mrs. Lovett, The Baker's Wife, Adult Women, or Chorus Girl No. 5.

Well, on Saturday I shall be paying a visit to Shrek. I have been scaling every site I know for understudy news. I think we all know how emotionally shattered I will be if Sutton Foster/Brian d'Arcy James/John Tartaglia does not go on. I'm going to a matinee show. I don't do matinees, but my mother does. Tourists scare me. That and the elderly folks who like to yell at everyone who dares open a water bottle. I am still scarred from a previous bad experience at In the Heights. I felt like I was in a long, boring biopic. "Episode Five: Miss Prissy Goes to the Thee-ah-tuh."

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